Over the past week I have been waking up at extremely unreasonable hours due to my jetlag from the arriving home from the UK. To fill the awkward and lonely time between 3:30am – 7:30am, I’ve been writing a big-ass summary of my trip overseas. I’ve been writing it to give you all a massive account of the whole trip and to tell you how much I’ve learnt and my overall feelings now that I’m home. I thought it was a pretty good idea too… but then I realise I was just repeating nearly everything I’d already written on my travel blog (sarahdinstravels.wordpress.com) and you can just re read that massive diary if you really want to know about everything that happened.
However there are some things my travel blog doesn’t include, such as feelings, lessons learnt, my reason for leaving and my reasons for even coming home. The Sisterhood joining Sinead and I for the final chapter wasn’t included either, but you can also read up on that in another travel blog made written by all of us (sisterhoodtravels.wordpress.com) (Whoa, we really do love to blog hahaha)
Ok. Let me start at the beginning.
When I was going through high school, I never saw myself as the type of girl who wanted to take a year off after year 12 to travel. In fact, I never imagined myself the type of person to travel at all – it honestly never interested me. As some would know, I’m petrified of flying. So that was reason 1. As others would know I was always content with my living situation at home whilst growing up – reason 2. And as everyone would know – Australia is amazing. Final reason – why leave it? More than anything though, I guess I was just plain lazy. I’ve never liked change. Typical creature of habit, I was. I never liked dealing with complicated situations on my own, I never liked being fully in charge, I never liked saving my money (just liked spending it) but most of all – I never liked being on my own. Since I was 15 I’ve always had a boyfriend and I think between my 2 main relationships I only had 2 months in there of being single, and I hated it. I hated not having someone to depend on to fix my car, pick me up from places, someone to call when I was waiting for something/someone, someone to talk to before bed – basically someone to rely on 24/7. And it was only till January 2010 when I realised enough was enough. Fresh out of my last relationship, I realised some things had to change. I seriously needed to find some strength, independence and some freaking life experience! I felt like I had no idea who I was when I was on my own, which then lead to other issues like body confidence and unhealthy weight loss. I was struggling and felt really unhappy with myself, so the decision to finally grown some balls was made. My gorgeous best friend Sinead and I both decided to fly to London and backpack around Europe mid year. Now looking back, (and I’m sure Sinead will agree) that was the best decision we have ever made.
Since being away, I have learnt SO much. I’ve learnt how to live on my own, buy my own groceries, weekly budgeting and taking on domestic challenges. I’ve learnt how to cook a tiny bit (if you knew me well before I left, all I ate was raw vegies, fruit and tinned tuna. Not necessarily to be healthy, but because I didn’t know how to actually cook with them hahaha.) and learnt a whole lot about respect for those you live with. Obviously I’ve only ever lived with my parents, so living with Sinead for 6 months was a whole new experience. An experience, though, which was neither hard or ever un-enjoyable. I really scored with that best friend of mine. There were never any issues which I am so happy about. It really shows how strong our friendship is.
Travelling around Europe really made me find a whole new level of appreciation for Australia, too. Whilst the cities of Europe are all so beautiful and different in their own unique way, there is also a lot of filth and poverty around. So much more than in Perth. For example, Barcelona: an amazing city with the most incredible beaches and markets…but a place full of thieves, dodgy men and pretty filthy streets. Also, if you were to compare the city of Paris to the city of Perth, the Australians are a lot cleaner, NICER and obviously more modern in the overall architecture of the place. So it was seeing these sorts of places which made me really appreciate how stunningly clean, fresh and beautiful Perth is… it was something I never really realised before. I also never really appreciated our gorgeous weather as much as I do now. Those last 2 months spent in London were not easy when stepping outside into -4 degrees. The wind can be so harsh, cracking your lips and forcing your skin to turn all leathery and hard. There were times where I thought winter was stupidly cold in Perth – Hah, not anymore. I have a feeling winter this year will be an absolute breeeeeze.
Before this trip, I never appreciated how good I really do have it with my parents as well. I feel like I really took them for granted before I left, because there were times where I missed them SO much more than I ever thought I would. There were times where I would go months without hearing from them, which hurt a lot at the time, but I’m really grateful for it now. Because the truth is, if I had spoken to them more often than I did, it just would have reminded me of how amazing they both are, how much I love them, and how much I wanted to be with them back at home. I really didn’t want to be feeling like going back at all during the trip, and the only reason I ever did feel that way would be because of them. They are two of the most amazing, generous and supportive people I know. I couldn’t tell you the type of screwed up child I would be right now without their guidance. Words will never describe how much they mean to me.
Another new found appreciation was discovered in my friends. As with my parents, I never realised how freaking amazing I have it with the group of beautiful people I surround myself with. I’ve always appreciated my friends, but I never realised just how much I really love them and need them for my own happiness and contentment. After being away from them for 5 months, I really realised just how happy they make me and how much I need them in my life. They are the most caring, genuine, supportive, hilarious, talented, witty, kind, thoughtful, considerate and compassionate people I have ever met in my life, and my appreciation for having them in my life only grew stronger from being away from them. Lani, Chris, Mitch, Sinead and Niki – you, besides my immediate family, are the only reason I couldn’t live away from home for too long. I just love you guys way too much.
The most important goal from this whole trip was to discover more about myself and what the hell it is that I want out of this life of mine. And now, I can so happily say, I really do feel like I achieved this goal. I realised I’m actually more capable of things than I ever gave myself credit for. Especially backpacking, that really stretched both Sinead and I to our limits – but we coped and became so much stronger and better for it. If you had told me a year ago that I would be backpacking around Europe, sharing rooms with up to 20 other people, going days without showering, eating my breakfast out of a half cut open water bottle, having the most romantic experience with an Irishman in his Parisian apartment, spontaneously getting a tattoo on my ribcage, cutting my hair short, drinking red wine (used to hate the stuff), eating snails, standing over Mozart’s actual grave, being so stoned I could barely move, moving into a house with an Indian, Frenchman, German and vampire, waking at 4am every morning to work in a bakery with a snot coloured uniform and making snow angles in the snow during Christmas time with my 5 gorgeous best friends – I would of laughed in your face. I would have then walked away, felt a sudden lack of satisfaction, come back, and laughed again. And now as a write this, I still can’t believe all those experiences are real. I love that I did all that, and all I want to do now is go back and do it again.
I feel much more independent and content with myself which is what I’ve been striving for for quite a while now. I figured out I wasn’t happy with my uni course and I’ve made the decision to drop it and follow something more promising as a career and something I’ve become far more interested in and passionate about. I feel like I know more about the person I am and the woman I want to be, which is the most amazing and rewarding feeling ever. All I have to do now is get there. But in the meantime, I’m 21, young, single, and thirsty to learn more about everything. I am most definitely not done with travelling either. My advice to all of you – get out there and see it. See it alllllllll.
Peace xxx
